coffee pro to home roasters: “loathe yourselves”!

November 27, 2006 – 10:42 am

this blog is deeply humbled to discover that what home-roasted sublimity it has discovered, by experience or by accident, is actually illegitimate! not worth the sale of cheap greens from pro to amateur! because, you know, excellence is kept under lock and key by certificate-toting triple-waveists. who knew?

of course, there are what the new york times calls “snobs” (this blog pleads guilty, well-meaning defenders notwithstanding). and then there’s simple arrogance. but that’s what we love about this whole communal, coffee-centric wave … if it weren’t for the tough love from britain’s quality clarion we would never have known to loathe ourselves!

p.s. keister-kovering kaveat: the actual newspaper piece being, er, roasted has yet to be actually found on these exhaustive interwebs. thus, we know not the identity of the offender. meaning: open season on hyper-reactive, curmudgeonly takedowns!

UPDATE: hoffmann has the scan! our culprit: steven macatonia of union coffee roasters. not only is he a “self-styled Roast Master,” but he has conquered the tortuous art of “sneering” one’s answers instead of, you know, just saying them out loud. as in:

home roasting is “a level of obsession sneered at by Roast Master steven macatonia. ‘i will not supply the green beans i buy to anyone,‘ he says.” (emphasis added)

wow. an even thicker wrapping of assured self-promotion than we had dared to fear! but wait … closer parsing appears to show that it’s not just home roasting that he’s so openly sneering at — it’s the “level of obsession”. in other words, macatonia doesn’t take his coffee that seriously! which could make his words the classic reaction of a man who feels threatened by the free flow of knowledge to amateurs, no? insert kim jong il analogy here…

even for a brit tabloid, the tone of the whole piece is, shall-we-say, a bit freak-of-nature-ish. british ‘snobs’ agree!

UPDATE: hoffmann questions the reporting. a legitimate loophole!

UPDATE: and you thought this blog was snarky … ahem.