loquacious brag week: bumper crop’s guat, yemen

August 29, 2008 – 11:44 am

we don’t care that these taste descriptors are meaningless to you — other blogs brag about their coffee spoils all the time! and so, we hereby parlay an unprecedented stretch of excellent brew — a home junkie’s full house — into an ENTIRE WEEK of loquacious gloating. amorphous crack-metaphors for the romantics, cupping notes for the serious students and a 17-point scale for the churlish analytics!

** bumper crop‘s guatemala de sola was a stealth plant by the barista-poet. untouched during his jaunt through the bloghouse — there was so much to pull — its finally emerged through a groggy fog one morning as this blog, typically one-dimensional and junkie-esque in its brewing methods, chucked some into the grinder and pretended as if it were intended for spro.

tangy, hard-to-tame cherry. steamed white rice. maple syrup. some shots randomly hard to mute, others suddenly winey and mellow. medium body. classic guat fruit. not a favorite, not an obsession, but easily a pleasure. worth, say, a 13. (we’re beginning to despise these numbers games … more than we already did!)

** bumper’s yemen mocca sanani, meanwhile, demanded that we wrassle it to the ground for a rough helping of dirty cocoa and muskier, dried cherry. almost a sun-dried-coffee-husk flavor to it, very quishr-esque. a sticky, lingering mouthfeel hung around, like some mascarpone-based yogurt-ish signature beverage. but then, ha-ha, we’ve never really heard of such a thing!

having recently roasted through 10 pounds of a strikingly similar yemen without anything remotely like pleasurable espresso, drinking this sanani was instructive for our continued hack efforts: hmmmm, nothing wrong with dirty fruit. maybe target the shoe polish for elimination. that yemen, it befuddles your normal roasting radar, progressing slower, burning faster, popping louder and distracting you with that relentless blizzard of chaff, calling your craven amateur bluff like so much feinting clownishness.

a vacillating 12. not that you could get any if you wanted. neither of these offerings appears on bumper’s online coffee list. it being a small-time idaho outfit, we suspect this is a necessary part of the charm.